We're Only Immortal for a Limited Time

FEMA's Waffle House Index

2011-09-01T14:47:00.003-04:00

Google=Skynet Part 9: Nothing's gonna save your one last dime 'cause it owns you

2010-10-11T11:34:00.004-04:00

I'll keep this short. Now Google is making cars that drive themselves.Also, they must have got all the speech samples they needed for the robots to understand us, because they are discontinuing their free 411 service.Previous Stories:Google=Skynet Part 8: Just because you're paranoid, don't mean they're not after youGoogle=Skynet Part 7: Could it be that the smog's playing tricks on my eyesGoogle

Standin' on a corner in Winslow, Arizona

2010-07-29T14:00:00.001-04:00

A few years ago, I had just finished my last semester in college. I got my final report card in the mail, only to discover that the professor for one of my online classes failed me. I was upset, as I had gotten A's and B's on all of my assignments. I called him, and he told me that I hadn't turned in the final exam, which was worth 40% of the grade. I looked in my sent mail folder and told him

Should we take action to mitigate the man-made causes of global warming?

2010-02-18T17:59:00.007-05:00

It's a hot topic, debated on every news channel and internet forum. Is global warming (or its new moniker "climate change") really happening?* If so, are we causing it?Those are the wrong questions. The questions we need to ask are:What will happen if we don't do something and man-made global warming is really happening?What will happen if we don't do something and global warming is real, but

A Homeopathic cure for obesity

2010-02-12T11:44:00.002-05:00

I just discovered a homeopathic reason for the obesity epidemic!Starting with the 2 premises of "like cures like" and "water retains a memory of all substances that have been introduced in it", I will show how the "modern" practice of sewage treatment has contributed to the obesity epidemic.First, what is the opposite of obesity? Starvation. What cures starvation? Food. What does too much food

Google=Skynet Part 8: Just because you're paranoid, don't mean they're not after you

2009-10-29T07:48:00.000-04:00

Via CollegeHumor, but there is nothing funny about it.Previous Stories:Google=Skynet Part 7: Could it be that the smog's playing tricks on my eyesGoogle=Skynet Part 6: 'Cause I think we've seen that movie, tooI've got a secret I've been hiding under my skinGoogle = Skynet, Part 4Jake's JK: This is not a good signUh oh, Google is at it againGoogle's Plan for Worldwide Domination

Google=Skynet Part 7: Could it be that the smog's playing tricks on my eyes

2009-10-28T12:00:00.001-04:00

Previous Stories:Google=Skynet Part 6: 'Cause I think we've seen that movie, tooI've got a secret I've been hiding under my skinGoogle = Skynet, Part 4Jake's JK: This is not a good signUh oh, Google is at it againGoogle's Plan for Worldwide Domination

The Internet is full of awesome

2009-09-10T11:04:00.001-04:00

I'm not saying that Glenn Beck raped and murdered a young girl in 1990, and neither ate these guys. All we are asking is why won't he deny it?

Forget 2012. 2019 is gonna be AWESOME!

2009-07-24T15:07:00.006-04:00

Once the realm of bad sci-fi movies, (and kickass tv shows) real life scientists are actually working on a simulation of the human brain. Seriously.Excellent news for fans of computer technology, neuroscience, and people who think that humans telling the machines what to do is totally backwards. Henry Markram, director of the Blue Brain Project, says we are ten years away from a functional

Google=Skynet Part 6: 'Cause I think we've seen that movie, too

2009-06-30T14:57:00.007-04:00

When an article is entitled New Technology Portends 'Sentient Computers', its going to catch my eye. Not because I think, "OMG! The robots are taking over!", but because its usually some hack job reporter extrapolating some basic technology's ability to an exponential degree. Not this time: “Landmark recognition software” can correctly identify many popular landmarks on the Web throughout a range

NSFW

2009-06-22T13:59:00.002-04:00

I couldn't beleive this made it past the censors when I saw it on tv the other day. On a Saturday afternoon. Not on something like E! or SpikeTV, but on, I think, MSNBC or some other cable news channel.It does get its point across, although the mime has a rather high opinion of himself.

My question is, did he win the Jeep?

2009-05-07T11:18:00.000-04:00

Every New Parent or Parent-to-be Needs to Watch This

2009-04-28T14:04:00.000-04:00

What's life without an occasional surprise?

2009-04-23T07:30:00.001-04:00

Don't worry dear, he's not that desperate…

2009-04-20T07:15:00.003-04:00

Today, April 20th, you will see all sorts of stories on the news about how the Columbine shootings happened 10 years ago. You may also hear about Pepsi and Mountain Dew "throwback" editions hitting store shelves. You probably won't hear anything about it being a stoner "high holiday".And you definitely won't hear anything about Hitler's worst birthday ever:

I got a vision in my head of how it should be

2009-04-17T07:50:00.002-04:00

What happens when you promote an event on the same morning as opening day for the NewYork Yankees by saying you are giving away Yankees tickets? Thousands of people show up to Times Square expecting tickets to the opening day game.What happens when those people find out that the tickets are for a game in June?This:"Pepsi used this as a format to promote their product and humiliate the Yankees

Its got no cd player, it only got the 8-track

2009-02-26T15:14:00.000-05:00

Sony Releases New Stupid Piece Of Shit That Doesn't Fucking Work

I'm shining up my saddle

2009-02-24T12:06:00.000-05:00

As you can see there's a new look around here. I took the time to clean out some old posts I may be less than proud of, and eliminated the pseudonym on my profile. It's the grownup thing to do.I also have a new blog chronicling my resumed weight loss program. Actually, it's more of a guilt trip than a program. I am posting pictures of everything I eat, so that family and friends can bitch at me

I'm sure this one will drive all sorts of new traffic here

2008-11-04T10:37:00.000-05:00