Line from obscure song loosely related to post subject matter

I'm on a roll...No self control

Whatever happened to stealing your dad's beer and drinking in the woods? Now kids have to shit in a bottle, piss in it, put a balloon over the opening, wait for it to ferment, then inhale the gas in the balloon to get wasted?

You think I'm kidding? Click the picture to see the bulletin.

This is what our Sheriff's department thinks? The Smoking Gun, too? Haven't they heard of Snopes?

Bonus points for Don Hunter's name and "butthash" appearing on the same page.

Sometimes the system goes on the blink and the whole thing turns out wrong

He'll save with a mighty hand

Animator vs. Animation by *alanbecker on deviantART

From the look upon your face, I see it's true: PWNED!!!

To Boldly Go Where Everyone Is Going...Eventually

I'm not planning on dying anytime soon, but when I do, I would like to be cremated. I just can't stand the knowledge that my body would be put in a hole in the ground where it would be infested with maggots, wasps, and beetles as it rots. Cremation seems so much more sanitary.

The ashes are the problem. I don't have one particular place that comes to mind as the place my ashes should be scattered. Living in Florida, the Gulf of Mexico seems nice, but its a little cliched.

Then today I found the urn I would like to spend eternity in. It, too, is a cliche: nerd wants his ashes in a Star Trek urn. But who cares? The thing looks cool! It looks more like a piece of metal sculpture than the trophy cup look of a typical urn. My kids and grandkids should appreciate such a nice piece to sit on their mantle. It could be worse: they also have Major League Baseball, Precious Moments, and AKC-themed urns.

Yes, the American Kennel Club.

As in urns for your dog.

Star Trek's not sounding so nerdy now, huh?

Oh, and for those of you who prefer to rot than to burn, they have caskets, too.

JK O'Lantern

This afternoon the family carved Jack O'Lanterns.

B painted a piece of modern art:



A carved a window scene from a pattern that came with the carving kit we bought:



We all had a hand in painting a Finding Nemo jack o'lantern.



Then there was mine.

I drew up a pattern on the computer a couple of weeks ago and finally got around to cutting up the gourd. As you can see, it got a little out of hand.



I mostly shaved the outer layer of skin off to allow light to shine through. The only places where I cut all the way through the rind were at the "JK" lettering and the fog and headlights.

Best Fucking Research Study Ever, Godammit!

A new study, "Swearing at work and permissive leadership culture: when anti-social becomes social and incivility is acceptable", was just published by the Leadership and Organisational Development Journal.

An excerpt from the story at Yahoo News:

…swearing in front of senior staff or customers should be seriously discouraged or banned, but in other circumstances it helped foster solidarity among employees and express frustration, stress or other feelings.

"Employees use swearing on a continuous basis, but not necessarily in a negative, abusive manner," said Baruch, who works in the university's business school in Norwich.

Banning swear words and reprimanding staff might represent strong leadership, but could remove key links between staff and impact on morale and motivation, he said.

To that, I say: "Poop!" doesn't count:

Oral Fixation Headline of the Day

Man Bit By Rattlesnake After Putting It in His Mouth to Impress Ex-Girlfriend

Ladies, would this make you want to get back with your ex, or would you laugh at him as his head swelled up and he tried to call 911?

Today's post is brought to you by the letters W, T, and F

Hey you!

Do you want the look of a sunroof without all the hassle of cutting a hole in the top of your car, messy leaks, and annoying sunlight coming through the roof of your car?

Well, the folks over at Bridge Imports have the perfect solution for you!

It's a sticker for the roof of your car that looks like a real sunroof! Without an actual hole you can look through.

Why?

We just don't know.

Why don't you ask the douchebag in the pictures? If you have an eBay account you can contact him through the link above.

Maybe if you're willing to spend the $30, you could trick your dumb friends into thinking you had a sunroof, as long as (a) they never actually get in your car, and (b) wait, who the hell cares if you have a sunroof if they aren't riding with you?