Monday, December 05, 2005

Atkins Update: End of Week 4

So I have completed almost a month of Atkins, and am proud to report that I only cheated on Thanksgiving (ok, and the day after, its all one big food-fest weekend, but I stopped by Friday night). Unfortunately two things have transpired that make it look like I will not make it to my goal.

Obstacle #1: According to my scale, I haven't lost any weight since the first week. My wife and my mirror are telling me another story. So are my clothes. Last week I was able to wear two different shirts that didn't fit a month ago, and hadn't for some time. Last night I was able to fit into my leather jacket that I got for my 16th birthday. It was snug, but last time I tried, I couldn't even zip it. So I got brave and pulled out my tuxedo. The last time I wore it was on my honeymoon, almost six years ago. It buttoned. It didn't fit, but it buttoned. So my scale is most likely sprung out and I should really check at one of those mega scales like thay have at the grocery store.

Obstacle #2: See previous post. My goal was to be down by 60 lbs. by my brother's wedding in May. Now he's getting married in 4 weeks. Asshole. Oh well, he will be able to show his kids how fat Uncle J used to be before they came along.

Now I have been excercising just about every day. I get up between 5:30 and 6:00 in the morning and ride the stationary bike before I really wake up. It goes so much faster when you can listen to the morning talk show idiots ramble and worry more about how stupid they are than how much your tailbone hurts from sitting on that goddamned diamond-hard, nut squishing, torture device they call a seat.

I am going to drop as much weight as I can by the wedding. I just wish my face and chin would thin out, because my suit will be a nice slimming black, but you cant hide jowels from the camera's eye. Hopefully, I can stop by Publix regularly for a more accurate weight check, although I won't be able to shed the heavy clothes and shoes for those check ins. The old ladies shopping there will drop their bananas.

3 comments:

Kara said...

Man, I wouldn't touch that diet with someone else's body. But I hope it works for you without permanent damage. Just be careful going off of it. Most people gain twice what they lost. Are you checking your ketones and all that?

Kara said...

Oh, I forgot. I found some awesome low carb ice cream when I was doing that wretched diet. It's damn good, but it's all lard. It's Ben and Jerry's swiss almond vanilla (or something to that effect), and you'd never know it didn't have sugar (that is, if you've already induced and lost the sugar taste). It kept me from straying a couple of times. Won't knock you out of ketosis, either, if you're careful.

God, I can't believe I'm talking about this. Gives me the shivers just to talk about it, although I admit it's really effective the first time you do it (only the first, according to research and my own experience).

I was on it for a looong time, so I've got lots of pointers if you need them.

J. said...

I was on the diet several years ago and did pretty well with it, then my work schedule changed and I went off it cold turkey and gained it all back. I am determined not to let that happen this time, got the recipe books and everything. Plus, its a lot easier now that there are so many low-carb products on the market.

I hadn't even checked the ice cream section at the grocery store. I figured, why tempt fate? I'm done with induction, and I've found that if I am REALLY good throughout the day, I can have one of those Little Debbie Christmas Tree Cakes... mmmmmm frosting. I will definitely have to look for the B&J's.